so i searched the internets for haunted new orleans, found st.louis cemetary no.1 and marie laveau(reputedly the most haunted place), went there with travis, jumped the gate at 11:30p.m., had a black cat cross our path(which is actually good luck) at midnight and then hang out and follow us... then i asked it to lead us to marie laveau and it started leading us in this weird running ahead and then sitting until we got close and then running up ahead and sitting and waiting again, meowing a bit... until she layed down in front of the actual tomb covered with red xxx's and voodoo offerings (see photo)... so i drew xxx's and left an offering...
the cat killed a loud flying cockroach and left it there as an offering too, apparently

Saur

if i only had a blog...
oh wait, i have like three or four... hard to remember them all

i wonder if there's a blog collating tool

content... contains... nothing

ahhhh... 31 years old today

damn

Well luckily I already had a blogspot blog from 2002... so extra credit is easy in this case
just ummm... don't read all of it :)

New York City, New York State, New York Country....

okay so so it's america... fucking sue me
It's been a long time since i've posted...
so i'll update really quick....
made it to santa barbara, travis and brett got arrested the first night i we got there... who knew it was suspicious behavior necessitating a search and warrant check to just stand next to your own car? oh well... they got out after about 30 hours or so but it was kinda bunk being all alone there... went to las vegas and had lots of fun with my family who flew out there... unfortunaly travis broke my damned vehicle and we had to salvage it but that allowed me to simple fly here, gayle is as beutiful as i remembered her and smells just as good we've had a good time here so far.. getting along very nice and talking with nakedness... i like that... it seems as though we'll be getting back together but i'll have to shift gears out of neutral and into first and hit the accelerometer.... i.e. i need to get a job and get my shit together... i've found a new rush of inspiration for my music and i will be writing and recording in my non-work/study time in muskegon... i've done all that vagabond shit and i've realized that just because i don't like everything about modern society it's not going to get any better if i simply drop out of it... i will not, however, stop being an artist... but i may use my creativity in programming computers as it's a little more marketable... la la la... oh yeah.. it's my birthday today.... going to see an off-broadway play... should be "the tragedy of frankenstein" if we can get tickets...
ummm... okay then

some town, oregon
meow...
hmmmm.... had a wierd night last night.... met some quite weird peoples.... but oh well... there was james, 32 yrs old, lives with his mother and grandmother... we helped him sell his food stamps... he brought us to george's... george is like 50 or so and is normal except for his wife who is obviously retarded and subserviant... and her face is all scarred... that's kinda wierd... we stayed at george's house last night... it's nice to take a shower... they all seemed nice but sad... and lonely...

oh and justian got off the truck in a wierd childish display that i won't even go into... but it's just travis and brett and i now....

seattle, washington
nothing really new today....
i almost got in a fight with this brittish girl named alley cat and lost soul.... i still can't figure out why but we were both posturing all karate like and shizznit.... but i don't think either one of us was really angry... also met a girl named kitty cat.... i bet there's lots of girls named cat on the streets... i should still get a good street name sometime... but jaron's so unusual it would kinda be pointless... some mexican conned me out of my new pit bull last night.... that bastard... oh well.. c'est la vi

okay so i figured out how to link to my e-mail address.. yay... like anyone reads this shit anyways....
well... another day has been fruitfully spent in Missoula, Montana... Travis and I scored some marijuana in the park today by some guy who is obviously working for the CIA... i mean why else would he wear big 80's sunglasses and a fishing hat and sell cheap drugs... oh well.. i don't really mind being a guinea pig... you ever wonder who gets tested when they decide that drugs are ready for human trials? well that's us... probably not however... i just like paranoia and all that jazz... gayle is talking to me again in the way that she would if i were her boyfriend... i guess we're both kinda talking that way... but status seems to be a fuzzy and useless aspect not worth talking about... i guess... or it's just way to risky for either one of us to start talking openly to the other one about how we feel so we talk about how we feel while censoring a slight part of it all.. i'm trying to figure out really big things to do... but it has to be legal and not purely opportunistic... or illegal and very little or controlled risk... i love it when beatiful girls walk by me and i smell perfume... just doesn't happen often enough...

mail

yay! i'm in wyoming... should be at the montana rainbow by days end... keep praying for my wayward soul....
oh yeah... i hung out in this park with two drunk lakotas who had both been in federal prison and both killed people... the one dude, wolfguts, even had tears tattooed on his cheek... the other sang me kind of out of tune lakota songs.... they say this land is their land... and i believe them...

i'm so hungry i feel ill.... i didn't realize that the church only served lunch mon-thur... oh well... questing for food... we're leaving here today... oh yeah... i almost got to beat up neo-nazis last night.... normally i wouldn't have joined up but these kids i knew from the rainbow were getting threated and the idea of a hippy vs. neo-nazi brawl was just way too appealing... it never happened though.... also i went to this podium in the middle of the main park here and plugged in my guitar and started playing to people walking by... only got like 75 cents but we were kinda yelling at the people walking by and being really obnoxious... then the police came after like an hour and told us no more but he said i was talented and he appreciated that.... so even that was okay.... i dreamt of gayle last night.....

i'm in madison wisconsin right now... great town... got drunk and wandered the streets last night and i'm blazing a trail today... but it's a great place... lot's of neato skreet kids and a 13 to 1 female to male ratio.... the company is always looking out for me... i even get christians to pray for me which as long as it's a prayer of blessing of some sort i'll take it... we ripped all the posters of the kiosks downtown but it's public forum so it's mine to rip and mutilate... if i had access to a printing press i could have fun making propaganda but alas.. i do not... this weird kid wants us to take him on the road with us.... he doesn't seem like a bad person... just all sketchy.... i don't think we're going to... bad vibes are bad.... maybe we will... i feel bad not..... i miss gayle.... it's weird how seeing her for just a couple of days brings it alllllll back right to the front again.... i mean she's always on my mind and she always will be.... it's just what part.... i think i like the front.....

bit,
my lip and,
my heart bled.

looked,
in me and,
came to be.

come,
i love you,
i hate you.

yes... i am a big fan of chaos.... i think i like alcohol because it makes things so intense.... life can get so routine... boring... after things get more and more repititous.. more mundane aspects of life become more important to you... you become your job, your clothes, your car, you start to forget who you really are

well i think i've caught up with all my old poetry... or what i'm putting on here anyways... so fuck... yeah....
i'm going to a party tonight... i don't know why i go to these things... it's not like i ever meet new people, network or what have you... i just smoke the pot and drink the beer and sit in the sidelines nauseously aware of all the goings ons and wishing i could just stop thinking about how they all think about me... even though i'm probably not even noticed... maybe tonight i'll try and pull one of my alter-egos out and make an ass of myself... at least i'll influence the night... blah

You echo like a pearl
in pale moon-lit water
Rippled in my mind
like a tongue full of blotter
And if I can you wouldn't float
on my heart's coast
In the corner of my eye
like a retired ghost

love is an echo;
i hear you calling,
again and again.

you were my last hope;
and now i'm falling,
again and again.

i love you when
the rain
tastes like you
i love you when
you walk down the street
pretending i don't know you
and you're somebody else
i love it when you're
in my thought
and your body haunts
my dreams

rainbow poetry^

shadows echo into beatings
of lonliness hearts cry
scream tear without within
hormones rage kill kill kill stab rip
the cortex into it only only
every every dead dreams harbor
lonly thought of self-
destruction rape the hope
of innocence take the
little homes and heads and
sleep and creep onto of you
will no mercy be spend
throughout the night will you
die reaching for what you
already have?

looking back it all seems
like a dream
cutting the clock like
erlinmeyer cream
we payed the rent on
our last four lifetimes
we payed the rent on
our childhood crimes
like the eternal indian
summer, simmering in your eyes
everytime i look at you
another piece of me dies
the old me that is
black, and grey
the old me that isn't
you

those are all old poems by the way... i'll get to new ones later

haiku! yay!

fleshy heart
learn who you are
stumble start

"gayle"

wine washed lips
pretending poison and pouting praise
breathing kisses
always blowing them my way
she stumbles, never trips
walking on dancing legs
dancing with her hips, always dancing them my way
gale force winds
have blown me over
lifted me up and away
gale force winds
have blown me away
lifted me up and over
and i'll always owe her
and i'll always love her
opales in her eyes
thumbed in by a god with inky fingers
you make me cry
you make me laugh and sing
i didn't look for you
i found you
i didn't try to complete
you completed me
and i could never let you down

sitting here
sitting high
murky clear
getting by
looking down
looking far
bloated child
we all are
i worship my box
it dances and sings
you have no food
i have gold rings
i worship my god
on my day off
and i love my kids
on my day off
and i worship my box
it dances and sings
and i worship my box
i'm your infant king

"sorrow tomorrow"
borrow a burough
through and and thorough
she was all she was
she was kind and afraid
cruel is the color of her curse
love is always followed by a hearse
"laugh", she cried in vain
cruel is the color, of her hollow pain
dressed in red to kill the night
she kills with vodka, drowns in light
she holds her children, ready or not
close enough to smell her rot

glancing in a mirror
always making sense
yes, you're getting nearer
love is heaven's wrench
everyday
looking in a looking glass
almost lost myself
keep you close at last
enduring dusty shelf

Well i'm making a "blog" yay! why? probably because my life is more interesting than yours... okay... well it's probably not... but i'm making one anyways... hmmm... i guess this post is more like a test than a real post...... you'll love me soon enough when i start putting some sort of content on here....